This is rediculous, I don't know if I should be mad, sad, or both. All I know is that I have never felt so lied to and betrayed in my entire life. He preaches one thing and does another. Grew up learning whats wrong and whats right. He thinks it was bad before wait till now. All my life he was there, helpin,g playing and just being what he thought it was I needed. Now looking back I have to second guess all of my good momories and who they were actually with, and  now I have the explinations for the bad ones and strange things I could'nt explain before. Im pretty sure nothing good can happen now, and it's pretty much down hill form here. And shes also falls in to the mix and is at fault. Never would have guessed this outcome in a million years. I had my suspicions and I'v found evidence before. Guess I was just in dinial and didn't want to beleive it. But now thw truth is out and there is no way to cover up how bad I truely feel. Im not quite sure on how to deal with this but Im gonna have to make it work. I'v been told things a child should not, and now I have to carry that with me. A friend is someone you can talk to but when you tell them something like this it just turns their world upside down. It's kind of sad that it happened but i dont feel bad for them. They made this mess so they can clean it up. Im tired of all the crap that i have going on in my head and tired of suffering because she needs a theripist. Im not sure how this is gonna end but Im sure its not gonna be good. Life sucks when you have problems of your own and then get other's problems thrown in your face. I just can'ttake it all. I need time to think, and space........... I need my space. They can act like it never happened and say to just forget about it. But the truth is, it did and it changed EVERYTHING.